Changed? Yes. But none has become the opposite of his or her former self, nor taken a sideways turn. Startled? At first, yes; in retrospect, no. Certain characteristics were clear in each of my friends as early as primary school, but when I was that age I gave those traits no significance. They were like freckles, just things I observed but never thought to question. But by the time we matriculated and began to choose our future careers and lives, those early signs had started to become much more obvious. Now in our sixties, we are like caricatures of our former selves - so exaggerated these traits have become. In one case, I find it tragically sad. Yet she brought it all on herself and despite the brutal health effects, she is still in denial.
I am sure of it... if not harder. I couldn't imagine being a teen in the world today. Where I live there are shootings and stabbings on a nightly occurrence. I couldn't imagine having to walk through a metal detector just to GO to school. Even at my old high school in a sleepy town in Oregon they have to. I am glad I was born and raised when I was. I feel for the children and parents today.
This post was edited by Merlin at October 8, 2018 3:38 PM MDT
Startled is a great word to use here but one I am not. I have found that the soul of a person stays in its basic form. The interactions with other people and situations it has been confronted with molds it day by day. Sometimes they are good and sometimes bad. Each one has different paths to learn and grow from. I am glad they HAVE Changed with time. Good or bad, they own the person they have chosen to be.
My friends who have changed have changed for the better. They’ve become husbands, wives, fathers, and mothers. They’ve become wonderful family oriented people. My friends who haven’t married have become more responsible, maturedl and have become better people. I’m only disgusted with one friend. I posted a question about it and explained the situation. He’s still a kind hearted person who’s always there for people. He just lost good judgment, hopefully temporarily.
This post was edited by Rizz at October 8, 2018 9:51 PM MDT
I hear ya, Rizz. It is very sad when you can see, bright as day, that there is nothing you can do. You want so badly to help them and they won't let you. Hang in there and know, your heart is in the right place. We can't help others unless they want to be helped. Personally, I would direct my attention to the chick who is doing this to him and take pictures and see exactly what IS going on. But that proves co-dependent behavior and we don't want that either. You are in a tough spot, Rizz. :( Just keep being the cool person you are. :) :)
This post was edited by Merlin at October 8, 2018 3:56 PM MDT
Thank you, Merlin. I’ve done what I can. I will not involve myself or resort to spying on her. He’s going to have to learn the hard way. Fortunately he hasn’t brought her up to me since I told him what I had to say and told him not to bring her up again. I think deep down he knows I’m right. He‘s infatuated with the idea of being in a relationship. She preyed on his weaknesses flawlessly. She knows exactly what to say and how to string him along.
Exactly! One of the many reasons I never go to high-school reunions is just that. I am so amazed people are still in the same neighborhood and dressing the same way.... and hanging out and worshiping the same quarterback, and so on. what a disaster! It is embarrassing to me for them. On the flip side, good for them. If that is what works all the more power. Now you've got me all confused! xoxo!
I'm surprised at the weak-mindedness I've seen in some people who I thought were smart.
This post was edited by Thriftymaid at October 8, 2018 9:50 PM MDT
My friends are all about the same age as I am (55). They have already "been there/done that", and are more comfortable in their own skin now, and they are OK with being who they are. I think I am sometimes more shocked at how much I have changed (for the better) over the years.
Don Barzini 