In some cases, it's 100% necessary. E.g., the "interventions" done with an addict and his or her family and close associates. Often times, this is the only way for the newly sober addict to be confronted with the enormity of the consequences of his or her behaviour. It can become the starting point for repairing the damage and making amends. And it can motivate the addict to work towards permanent sobriety.
Or in quotidian life... e.g., When my husband had made up the donkey's feed incorrectly, forgetting to add the supplement that prevents osteoporosis, I had to take him down to the barn and show him the feed he'd made up the day before. I would never point out a mistake unless it was real, but he was (is) so unwilling to accept that he might or could make a mistake that the only thing I could do was insist that he come and see for himself. It shouldn't matter in such small things but, unfortunately, it applies to a vast number of small details - and some of these can have life-threatening consequences, like the need to be careful to stand away from the line of fall when cutting down a dead tree.
Nevertheless, a confrontation does not have to be nasty or abusive. If one keeps it factual and maintains an atmosphere of good will, a difficult communication can often lead to positive results. The key is to keep anger out of it.
This post was edited by inky at December 4, 2018 6:29 PM MST
