I don’t get it. Help me understand.
Given your atypical reactions to the deaths of people close to you, I'm not sure there is any way to explain how other people react which would be comprehensible to you.
If you are not capable of modeling other people's emotional states within your own mind, there's no way to describe them that will make sense.
Imagine if you couldn't see the color yellow and any object in the world that reflected electromagnetic radiation primarily in the wavelengths 577 to 597 nm looked gray to you. I could try to explain what yellow "looks like" until the cows come home, but without the ability to perceive 577-597nm light as distinct from other wavelengths, the subjective experience of seeing yellow would be a total mystery to you.
I think you are encountering the same problem in understanding other people's emotional reactions.
(H/T psychologist Dan Gilbert for the the "yellow" idea)
It's complicated, extremely complicated. In order to answer, there is no quick, easy, nor concise way to do it.
First of all, how to define the concept behind the word "care". Its dictionary definitions provide an avenue, yet it can also go far beyond academics. The way your original question is posted, and the way you ask above how does it feel to me, am I the type to care, all beg for broad diatribes in explaining. For brevity's sake, the word 'empathy' encompasses it quite well. The death of US basketball star Kobe Bryant on today's date spurned a lot of this conversation, and truth be told, its announcement followed and preceded the announcements of dozens or hundreds of other deaths of people worldwide, people whose deaths did not spurn equally in-depth conversations. The empathy we 'feel' as human beings when learning of the death of one of our own species is neither curt in its explanation nor easily dismissed, depending, of course, on who has passed on. Had we learned of the death of an enemy, an opponent, a vile person, our reactions, both mental and emotional, are understandably different than had it been a loved one, a friend, an acquaintance, etc. Also, none of these considerations are restricted to our own species: often, the death of an animal can bring out very strong emotions in some people.
So you've asked specifically about celebrity deaths, those of celebs not personally known to us. Having one's name and likeness interjected into our lives on a continual basis often causes an artificial link in the minds of some people to the point that they think they're closer to the famous person than they really are.
If you've already read some of my commentary on the other post where Kobe Bryant's death was first announced here, one of the first things I brought up is the fact that others died in the incident also. I mentioned that in addition to a famous person, and in this case his 13-year-old daughter was another victim, there are human beings whose names we may have never heard of before who died too. In some ways, that speaks to a similar idea to your question, wherein you asked about the general reaction to a famous person dying, and I expended upon it by mentioning all the people who had died in this incident. I originally only knew of 5 deaths in the helicopter crash, I later updated it to 9 deaths. I'm not a basketball fan at all and I never have been. I know very little of Kobe Bryant and even less about his 13-year-old daughter, still less about the other 7 victims.
Now to address my own feeling, ask you asked. I don't know that I assign it to an actual feeling, an emotion, because I separate feelings and thoughts. When I learned of this particular celebrity dying, I experienced disbelief, shock and surprise in the immediate sense. I don't know if that's feeling or thought, but I'm willing to bet on the latter. Did I or do I "care" about the actual person and the actual people who died? Of course I do, on an empathetic level. I did not shed a tear nor drop to my knees and bellow to the ceiling while beating my chest and tearing out my hair, "WHY, WHY, WHY, WHY? Why did You have to take him? It's too soon, he's too young, he had so much more to do! It's not fair, it's not fair, it's not right!" Even though a tragic event has taken place, my everyday life goes on as usual. People react differently to stimuli. Some people committed suicide in a copy-cat fashion when Rudolf Valentino, Marilyn Monroe, Curt Cobain and Robin Williams did it. Some people got tattoos commemorating Tupac Shakur died. Some people created altars in the homes when Elvis Presley died (well, many of them merely upgraded the existing altars they already had). Some people rush out and buy all the merchandise they can that is associated with their favorite celebrity when he or she dies. Some people gather in public vigils or travel to the funeral cite when their favorite celebrity dies. Others go about their business as usual. The way people feel, and their actions as a result of it, vary vastly. If you hear of a torture victim, you may react to the news differently than another person does, right?
In conclusion, the reason I said I can't explain it to you is that it's not easy to explain. I'm certainly no expert on explaining it, partially because I don't have a deep reaction nor a long-lasting to a celebrity death. Other people do. I can't speak for them, so I can't explain it to you. I think you posed a very, very good question, I really do.
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SaltyPebble 