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CosmicWunderkind
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Discussion » Questions » Finance » If I had supernatural power to turn lead into gold, how could I explain where I got it if I go sell to a legitimate bullion dealer?

If I had supernatural power to turn lead into gold, how could I explain where I got it if I go sell to a legitimate bullion dealer?

Say about 5 pounds. Can gold be 'laundered'?

Posted - November 6, 2020

Responses


  • 10466
    Gold can only be laundered by hand, as its molecular density will ruin a washing machine (note: never try to launder gold at a laundromat). 

    No explanation needed.  Simply grind up the gold into small chunks and flakes, then say you mined for it.  [Note: - don't try to sell it all at once... gold buyers are required to tell about the government about every sale.  Large sales tend to raise suspicions.  When suspicious, they send out people to see where you mined the gold, then they find your still, then they want to see your permit to distill liquor, they you have to "make them go away".... no, it's best to sell it in small quantities and use different names.]

    Having the superpower of alchemy is fun at first, but once you get rich, you'll find that you're somehow related to over half the country... and they're all short on cash. (note: yes, there really is such a person as your 23rd cousin on your 5th uncles' step nieces' side)
      November 6, 2020 10:53 PM MST
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  • 13395
    Ok,  very good!
      November 6, 2020 11:04 PM MST
    3

  • 52936

     

      VERY funny, well written, and only one typo!

      November 7, 2020 12:39 PM MST
    2

  • 10466
    type-d'oh!
      November 7, 2020 2:39 PM MST
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  • 5835
    You don't have to explain anything. I have always dealt with https://www.midwestrefineries.com/ You simply mail your gold to them with a note saying how you want to be paid. And that's it.

    It's only when you go to a pawnshop that you have to have a story.
      November 7, 2020 1:04 AM MST
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  • 17398
    You can just ask a mugger to help you get rid of it. :)
      November 7, 2020 1:48 AM MST
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  • 13395
    Well how do I 'get rid of it' then? I don't wanna just get rid of my gold, I want dollars!.
      November 7, 2020 7:15 AM MST
    1

  • 85
    Sell it on eBay or a Nigerian prince?
      November 7, 2020 7:34 AM MST
    3

  • 7280
    Troy ounces, yes?---    Call me---let's talk.

    .
      November 7, 2020 5:06 PM MST
    2