Listen, if they need help, I can be there in no time. I have a Canadian ex-wife who will let me sleep on her couch. The whole job should take me until February of 2051 to complete.
~
Randolph Pass, Handsy Harbor, Mount Randy, Ran-Ran Ridge, Cellar Valley, Randynistan, Gigolo Peak, Rand‘s Wood, New Randall Fields, Sammichville, Randionium Plain, Grammar Point, Randallton, Harem Heights, North Saint Randwell, South Saint Randwell, Stalker Meadows,
(Actually, I could go on and on, but I don’t want this to seem a little bit as if it’s all about me . . . )
The Chamber of Commerce met with the local organization known as Rally And Network for Decency (RANDY), and you’ve been voted down for the seemingly seedy nature of the name with its similarity to a sex shop or a brothel or both. Besides, Randy D plans to open a chapter of his Harem in each Canadian province, both old and new, and he’d rather not have to compete with lesser providers. Run along now, your services of filth and degeneration are not wanted here. Shoo, SHOO!
~
Ok, but let Livvie’s Wonderland in and that will hasten the fall of entire country of Canada.
~
I can barely wait to get my hands on my new land! I’ll erect a school on it where I can teach those unruly Canadians how to spell words the correct way!
Hey, keep your hands out of my province.
*slaps your hand*
Stop it! Stop it now!
He’s doing it again!
Hold still and quit wiggling so much, I only have a gallon of this massage oil, and you’re making me spill it. Grrrrrrr.
~