Literally, 3:00am -- total darkness
I was asleep in bed
I woke, thought, "What was that noise? Sounds like a creature of some kind"
Checked and my cat was on floor sleeping in her usual spot
And then something flew against my head
"Bat"
Light on - yes, a small bat flying around
Turn off bedroom light
Grab cat, leave bedroom, shut bedroom door (to hopefully keep bat in my bedroom)
Run cat down to basement and shut basement door so she stays down there
Grab broom
Turn on only outside porch light
Open front door to outside porch
Back upstairs
Bat is still in bedroom
Open bedroom door and bat starts flying toward light downstairs
For a while I swing at it, swearing, "Get the h""" out" as it decides to explore more of my first floor in my small house
Swearing and yelling, I find bat flying in my kitchen in back of house
Open kitchen door to outside
Turn on overhead light, yelling and swinging toward it with broom (only actually came in contact about three times)
Bat flies outside
I shut all doors, turn off lights and go to basement to find my cat quietly sitting and looking at me
I gave her well-deserved crunchy treat bites that she loves (good for her teeth the package says)
And . . .
I did NOT apologize to that bat even once
“If a bat got into my current home, I might never sleep another night in my home.”
You know you always have a place to sleep in my spare bedroom . . .
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Wait . . . did someone say “basement”?
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Wait, you spoke with Jane S? Was it in person, did she invite you over to her place? If so, hook a brutha up with the address, or directions, or coordinates, or draw a map, or take me there the next time you go, or something! You know she wants me, man! Don’t keep the goods all to yourself!
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