Discussion » Questions » Death and Dying » What are things people say about the dead or death that are meant to sound nice, but really aren’t nice?

What are things people say about the dead or death that are meant to sound nice, but really aren’t nice?

I know Grandpa’s looking down from heaven…

I hope not, lol.   Eww, he didn’t need to see that.

Posted - November 27, 2022

Responses


  • 13277
    They passed away peacefully.
    They should rest in peace. But they’re really not resting for anything. It’s not as if they’re going to wake up.
      November 27, 2022 9:07 PM MST
    3

  • 5451
    Rest in peace just reminded me of a couple of completely tasteless jokes, lol.  Now I’m laughing all by myself.  I’m weird like that.
      November 27, 2022 9:14 PM MST
    4

  • 13277
    Maybe you’re just weird, lol. Just like the rest of us on here.
      November 27, 2022 9:31 PM MST
    4

  • 5451
    That means I fit in here, so I guess you’re stuck with me.  How depressing is that?
      November 27, 2022 9:34 PM MST
    4

  • 13277
    Pretty terrible!
      November 27, 2022 9:47 PM MST
    4

  • 44648
    He/she is in a better place...How do we know that?
      November 28, 2022 7:09 AM MST
    5

  • 5451
    I know the dearly departed is at A Better Place because I haven’t picked up the ashes yet.  I’ll swing by there on the way to the store later today.  I promise.

      November 28, 2022 8:18 PM MST
    3

  • 10661
    Everything said isn't for the deceased, rather it's meant to comfort those who are still living.  Death rips a big hole in people's lives.  Saying callous things about a deceased loved one is like throwing salt into an open wound.  So as not to be heartless, we say things like, "they're looking down on us from heaven", "they're in a much better place", "at least they're no longer suffering", "heaven has a new angel now", or "they're with Jesus now".  In reality, we don't - can't - know where they "are".  We only know where their body is (planted in the ground, sitting in a box in the closet, fish food, in the freezer out in the barn, etc.).
      November 28, 2022 10:53 AM MST
    6

  • 5451
    You know where the body is too?  Really?  How do you know?  Okay, just forget that you ever looked in that freezer in the barn. 
      November 28, 2022 8:46 PM MST
    5

  • 10661
    Dang wood chipper's broke.
      November 28, 2022 8:49 PM MST
    4

  • 5451

    I know.  I loaned it to Gaear and he broke it. 

      November 28, 2022 8:59 PM MST
    6

  • 53524

     

    (broken)

      November 28, 2022 10:15 PM MST
    3

  • 10661
    That's what broke it.  Some one chipped the "n" (~~~~).   Wait a minute...  Who do we know who likes to chip things into "~"s?  
      November 29, 2022 9:18 AM MST
    4

  • 5451
    If you’re finding ns inside of the broken wood chipper, blame Randy.  He likes to shove ñs in there so he can get the ~s off of them. 
      November 29, 2022 6:54 PM MST
    3

  • 53524

     

    Move along, people, nothing to see here, she’s most likely a deranged lunatic who escaped from the local booby hatch, go on about your business, don’t listen to her incoherent blitherings, please clear sidewalks, that’s it, nothing of interest going on here, just routine, she doesn’t know what she’s talking about, Randy D is a staunch and upright pillar of the community, a stellar citizen, it’s all fake news, please just move along . . .




    ~

      November 29, 2022 11:55 PM MST
    2

  • 844
    But that's a run on sentence, Randy. I can't believe you did that.
      November 30, 2022 11:50 AM MST
    2

  • 53524
      November 30, 2022 11:59 AM MST
    1

  • 844
    In 1963 my father died of leukemia at the age of 57. An attendee at the wake said to me, "You know that they can cure that now." Look how long that one sentence has stayed with me.
      November 28, 2022 12:27 PM MST
    6

  • 5451
    That’s pretty insensitive.  I wonder if it ever dawned on him that it was the wrong thing to say.
      November 28, 2022 8:37 PM MST
    4

  • 53524
      November 28, 2022 10:11 PM MST
    4

  • 23637

    I don't know what to say but, also, only share a sad face, too.  :(

      November 29, 2022 6:19 PM MST
    3

  • 13277
    Often it's best - and OK - to say nothing and simply be present.
      November 29, 2022 7:51 PM MST
    2

  • 23637
    Agreed.  :)
      November 30, 2022 8:08 PM MST
    1

  • 11087
    Anyone ignorant enough to think leukemia is curable (as of today), is probably ignorant about funeral etiquette as well. 
      November 29, 2022 6:47 PM MST
    4