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Discussion » Questions » Animals (Pets/ Domesticated) » There's been a death in the family. How long does it take to get over the death of a beloved pet?

There's been a death in the family. How long does it take to get over the death of a beloved pet?

Our much-loved cat Tigger had to be put down on Tuesday. He was with us for 12 years. Leukemia. It's really hard. How did you cope? What did you do to make it not hurt so terribly?

Posted - July 26, 2017

Responses


  • 2657
    Sorry for your loss Rosie.
    It's hard, it's just hard. I will have to put down my moms blind dog this year, put down her other dog last year due to cancer. Put down my wife's cat two years ago ironically due to sarcoma from the Leukemia vaccine, and a few dogs of mine over the years.
    Only think I can think of is to be around family as much as you can, especially any that are pet lovers that can empathize. Unfortunately, cats and dogs were not made to live as long as us and many of us, self included, treat them as if they are members of the family. I know it hurts RosieG, again, sorry for your loss.
      July 26, 2017 6:10 AM MDT
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  • 113301
    ((hugs)) Thank you for your kind response my friend. Jim is just devastated. I keep talking to Tigger quietly mentally silently telling him over and over how much daddy and mommy love him and always will and what a wonderful family member he was and is still. I removed a few things like cat litter and cat food. The cat good I put in a large bag and at some point I think we will go to a shelter and give it to them. But he had two cat beds which I have now put on a sofa in the living room we we rarely sit on. In full view of our reclining chairs I put his favorite blanket over. I also put 4 pictures of Tigger, one with Jim holding him, in an 8-1/2 x 11 Lucite frame which is now on a bookcase shelf and put a few of his favorite colorful cat toys by it. I don't know if you've seen the little colorful balls with bells in them? Well several of them are by the photos. All pet owners know this day will come but we didn't think it would come so soon. The vet said that by the time symptoms show up for Leukemia it's not curable. He was fine for so many years. She said we did the right thing. We would not want him to suffer just to keep him alive for us. The outcome would be the same. Certain death. His organs were shutting down. The Vet said he could soon go into convulsions and that would be horrible. SIGH. This is just the first day tex. I've lost pets before through the years but usually we had them for a year or two. This one adopted us and stayed. He was a stray. Thanks for the support. I really appreciate it m'dear! You've been through a lot with regard to losing pets. I'm sure it never gets easier does it?
      July 26, 2017 12:52 PM MDT
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  • 2657
    No, sorry to say, it doesn't seem to get any easier. Just take comfort in knowing that you and Jim loved and cared for him and gave him the best life possible. I am sure that you did the right thing in not letting him suffer.
      July 26, 2017 1:43 PM MDT
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  • 19942
    My condolences, Rosie.  I know how much pets contribute to the family and when they die, it's like losing a loved one.  I don't have any pets, but I know people who have had this happen and it just takes time. 
      July 26, 2017 9:36 AM MDT
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  • 113301
    Thank you for your reply Spunky. My sister and brother-in-law lost their cat CALI about 5 years ago so I emailed her and she responded with helpful counsel. I know about loss and I know that it takes time. It happened yesterday. We took Tigger to the vet for her to figure out what the problem was and had no idea we would never bring him home again. But I'm kinda chatting with him in my mind. I used to talk to him all the time. I even sung to him from time to time. My Jim is really devatsated. But we'll get through it I know. It's just a very hard thing to pick up the pieces of a broken heart and just move on. We won't get another pet. Tigger was it. :(
      July 26, 2017 12:58 PM MDT
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  • 19942
    Yes, it does take a lot out of you, especially when you weren't expecting it.  My sister said she would never get another dog, but about a year after her second dog had to be put down, this fantastic soft coated Wheaton terrier came into her life and she can't imagine being without him. 
      July 26, 2017 1:46 PM MDT
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  • 7132
    I'm so sorry to hear that. A pet truly is a member of the family. Everyone is different when it comes to grieving and there really is no set timetable. For me, accepting whatever emotions did come up, being kind and patient with myself, sharing memories, and at times just finding distractions, all helped to hasten the healing process.  
      July 26, 2017 9:48 AM MDT
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  • 3463
    I am so sorry for your loss and losing a pet is losing a family member.
    It takes time for us to heal after losing any family member that we love.
    When you are up to it, you might think about getting another pet because that helps to ease the pain of the one you lost.
      July 26, 2017 9:59 AM MDT
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  • 22891
    ive never had a pet but i dont think you ever get over losing a pet or human
      July 26, 2017 1:43 PM MDT
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  • 7280
    Like any wound, it leaves a mark even after it heals.  The pain depends on the individual and his / her general philosophy of life.

    I fancy that all our pets actually are created and given to angels, are then loaned to us for a short period of time, and after which they return to their first owners.

    Fanciful? Magical?---perhaps, but wouldn't that be cool?

    And "the Rainbow Bridge" is heaven's dog park---

    Just this side of heaven is a place called Rainbow Bridge.

    When an animal dies that has been especially close to someone here, that pet goes to Rainbow Bridge. There are meadows and hills for all of our special friends so they can run and play together. There is plenty of food, water and sunshine, and our friends are warm and comfortable.

    All the animals who had been ill and old are restored to health and vigor. Those who were hurt or maimed are made whole and strong again, just as we remember them in our dreams of days and times gone by. The animals are happy and content, except for one small thing; they each miss someone very special to them, who had to be left behind.

    They all run and play together, but the day comes when one suddenly stops and looks into the distance. His bright eyes are intent. His eager body quivers. Suddenly he begins to run from the group, flying over the green grass, his legs carrying him faster and faster.

    You have been spotted, and when you and your special friend finally meet, you cling together in joyous reunion, never to be parted again. The happy kisses rain upon your face; your hands again caress the beloved head, and you look once more into the trusting eyes of your pet, so long gone from your life but never absent from your heart.

    Then you cross Rainbow Bridge together....

    https://www.rainbowsbridge.com/Poem.htm

    (Of course, those of you who don't believe in a God who is all good and shares His goodness will consider this answer to be mostly ridiculous---All I can do for you is to feel sorry about that.)




    This post was edited by tom jackson at July 26, 2017 7:08 PM MDT
      July 26, 2017 3:45 PM MDT
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  • 46117

    Condolences from Sharonna and Old School
      July 26, 2017 6:51 PM MDT
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  • 16197
    Sorry for your loss. A pet is a member of the family, but always a temporary one. Focus on the happy memories.
      July 26, 2017 7:08 PM MDT
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