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Discussion » Questions » Life and Society » Have you ever changed the name your parents gave you? What prompted you to do it?
Benedict Arnold

Have you ever changed the name your parents gave you? What prompted you to do it?

An astrologer friend has advised me that if I changed my birth name to one beginning with S or P, my life would be much happier. But I'm very hesitant to do it for it would definitely be a huge insult to my very loving parents. Besides, who knows if it wouldn't cause my life to take a turn for the worse?

Posted - February 26, 2019
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Responses


  • 4624
    Yes.

    I changed my surname to disassociate from my father (who by then had died). There were several reasons. The name was posh and aristocratic, which does not go down well in an egalitarian country. Some of my ancestors had committed atrocities against the indigenous people of this land - a source of overwhelming shame. My father frequently sexually abused me when I was small - so why would I want his name?

    I later changed my first name - because as a child it was only used to call me or in anger. As a young adult I noticed that whenever anyone called me by my name, I cringed on the inside.
    When I chose a new name for myself, that inner reaction stopped.
    Now, when I tell people my chosen name, I get universally pleasant reactions. It helps me to feel more comfortable being myself.

    Changes of name are not uncommon in my country - I'd guess at least 50% of the people I know have legally changed their names by deed-poll.
    If we get to know each other very well we may share the original name - but we would never presume to call each other by that name. That would be an offence of gross rudeness.

    This post was edited by inky at February 27, 2019 6:03 AM MST
      February 26, 2019 6:15 PM MST
    5

  • You seem to have had some very powerful and very disturbing reasons for changing your name. And having done that, you feel much better about yourself. I'm happy for you.
    How did you decide upon your new name and surname? That would be interesting to know. For example did you name yourself after a loving relation for whom you have happy memories, or did you choose them out of the blue because they sounded good or felt very different from your original name? 
      February 26, 2019 6:28 PM MST
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  • 4624
    The second syllable of the surname was "court". I took out the "cour" and the resulting abbreviation was another surname as common as Smith or Jones. This worked for me - I liked the relative anonymity.

    For my first name I chose an unusual abbreviation of my birth-name. This also worked.

    Both names have positive and pleasant meanings.

    Most of the people I know who changed their names did so for religious reasons when they became the disciple of a particular guru. He would give the new name - something like Viveka, Jayavinda or Shivadharma. Buddhists took on names like Panya Varro.
    It was considered that leaving behind the old identity assisted the spiritual work.
    I think, to a degree, it does.

    How about you, Neelie? Have you ever changed your name?
      February 26, 2019 6:40 PM MST
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  • No. I never felt the need to. As I said my real name is Neelam. Neelie is just a pet version of it. My parents call me Neelu. 
      February 26, 2019 7:05 PM MST
    1

  • 17558
    What is your country?

      February 27, 2019 1:09 AM MST
    1

  • 53328
      Per her profile, Nom de Plume is in Australia.
    ~
      February 27, 2019 5:52 AM MST
    0

  • 53328

      Nope.

    ~
      February 26, 2019 9:21 PM MST
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  • 17558
    Only my last name when I married.

    When I was quite young I hated my Christian name.  I never heard of anyone else having such a name as mine.  When I would get to go somewhere like the community pool I would tell people my name was a common name of my choosing for the day.  


      February 27, 2019 1:12 AM MST
    3

  • 16590
    No, but I did shorten it.
      February 27, 2019 3:25 AM MST
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  • 14795
    My name was changed for me by my younger sister......she was the first to call me Nice Jugs and my elder brother overheard and the name kind of stuck......
    My parents and grand parents ,extended family and close friends always call me it to or the many shortened versions of it....N.J our just Juggs....
    only people that don't know me use my actually name....
      February 27, 2019 3:46 AM MST
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  • I just changed my last name when I got married.  
      February 27, 2019 4:40 AM MST
    2

  • only when i was married i changed my last name

    i have thought about shortening my first name tho This post was edited by Benedict Arnold at February 27, 2019 7:05 AM MST
      February 27, 2019 5:59 AM MST
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  • Shortened the first name.....I suppose it was people's aversion to wanting to waste three syllables to address someone that prompted it. 
      February 27, 2019 6:01 AM MST
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  • 6098
    Upon marrying I took my husband's name.   Which though common I think is more attractive than my own.  As well as less "ethnic".  And does not cause people to think of a famous football player. 
      February 27, 2019 6:10 AM MST
    1