When you arrive home which would you prefer; scent of flowers or aroma of something dee licious cooking?

My anecdote (a Randydote):
  More than a decade ago, I bestowed upon my beloved the surprise gift of a couple’s massage. I had been getting massages for years and had often invited her along, she always declined. She was even prepared to also decline the gift, but when she found out that I had paid in advance and that it was non-transferable, non-refundable, she accepted, yet reluctantly so. I still had to drag her there as if it was her execution day. Before, during and after the massage, she practically hated everything about it. She whined, moaned and complained so much that she just about guaranteed that it would be a bad experience, and that’s exactly what happened. In the ensuing years, she has had a few massages from people recommended to her by her coworkers or aunt or cousin. She’s in a profession wherein back, neck, shoulder, leg and foot pain are quite common, so in acquiescence, she went with those other women to check out those massages. She has only moderately enjoyed them, however, and is not a fan of them the way I am. Other than the massage itself, she balks at the cost, too. 
  So, it’s not an automatic nor immediate fix-all completely across the boar to give one’s wife the gift of massage. 

To me massages are about feeling really good and wanting to make others feel really good.  And about being comfortable with our bodies. 

How about a hamburger bun massage?  I can use the meat juice for oil, and the bun and seeds would serve as an interesting scrub while working the tender spots.  

Very creative with your meat usage and bun availability.  
The ever-forgotten buns.  That is a massage, not meant sexually, to feel really good.
Those muscles are usually forgotten when non-professionals give their mates a massage.

  B...b...bu...but...but (no pun intended) I don’t want to end up smelling like a Big Mac or a Whopper Jr after the massage!  Dogs might  chase me home!



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You'd like to smell edible, huh?

Dogs wouldn't get a chance to chase me.
I'd stop, enjoy the licks and have a good play with them.

  Where did you get that from? It’s the exact opposite of what I wrote. I don’t want to smell edible. I don’t want to be licked by dogs, either. 

:(

Ha, ha! Hee, hee, hee! ;)

Whoops, sorry. That's not like the usual me. Mia culpa. :( This post was edited by inky at October 26, 2019 7:33 PM MDT

Gracias. 

:)

And the essence of European violets makes a great flavouring in sweets. :)

Yeay raw food!!!!!

Do it in the raw!!  Cooking and all!!  It's the best way, any day!!
Love Ya BANNED FOR LIFE!! :) :)

  (Sigh.)  Folks, I signed up for this love affair, so I'm in for a penny and in for a pound. I'll do whatever it takes to make my Baby's day, because in turn she does whatever it takes to make my night. (Wink, WINK!)


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Now if that were really your photo, we might have a chance.

  Now if that were really your photo, we wouldn’t. Jes’ sayin’.