"I believe in the church of baseball. I've tried all the major religions, and most of the minor ones. I've worshipped Buddha, Allah, Brahma, Vishnu, Siva, trees, mushrooms, and Isadora Duncan. I know things. For instance, there are 108 beads in a Catholic rosary and 108 stitches in a baseball. When I learned that, I gave Jesus a chance. But it just didn't work out between us. The Lord laid too much guilt on me. I prefer metaphysics to theology. You see, there's no guilt in baseball, and it's never boring, which makes it like sex. There's never been a ballplayer slept with me who didn't have the best year of his career. Making love is like hitting a baseball: you just gotta relax and concentrate. Besides, I'd never sleep with a player hitting under .250, not unless he had a lot of RBIs and was a great glove man up the middle. You see, there's a certain amount of life wisdom I give these boys. I can expand their minds. Sometimes when I've got a ballplayer alone, I'll just read Emily Dickinson or Walt Whitman to him, and the guys are so sweet, they'll just sit there and listen. 'Course, a guy will listen to anything if he thinks it's foreplay. I make them feel confident, and they make me feel safe, and pretty. 'Course, what I give them lasts a lifetime, and what they give me lasts 142 games. Sometimes it seems like a bad trade, but bad trades are part of baseball - now who can forget Frank Robinson for Milt Pappas, for God's sake? It's a long season and you gotta trust it. I've tried 'em all, I really have, and the only church that truly feeds the soul, day in, day out, is the church of baseball."
"Well, I believe in the soul. The cock. The pussy. The small of a woman's back. The hanging curveball. High fiber. Good Scotch. That the novels of Susan Sontag are self-indulgent, overrated crap. I believe Lee Harvey Oswald acted alone. I believe there ought to be a constitutional amendment outlawing Astroturf and the designated hitter. I believe in the sweet spot, soft core pornography, opening your presents Christmas morning rather than Christmas eve, and I believe in long, slow, deep, soft wet kisses that last three days. Good night."
This post was edited by Stu Spelling Bee at April 8, 2021 6:49 AM MDT
I admit the movie never intrigued me to watch. I'm not much of a sports fan but I know the movie is really well respected. and I realize not being a sports fan, in and of itself, need not keep me watching a movie about a sport. :)
Thanks for the videos! I admit I didn't watch them because I don't want anything ruined for me if I do choose to watch the movie. I do like all three of those performers in that second clip.
(I think we talked about that I was an extra in one of his movies. And one day, I saw from afar, Susan Sarandon on the film set, even though she was not in the movie. I can't remember if they're still together - - I'm thinking they're married.)
I laughed a lot at that movie! I've only seen it once! :)
PLOT SPOILER!!!! "BLAZING SADDLES"!
I think what I remember most (if I'm remembering correctly) is the very ending credits, I think -- they all break into some big swimming musical finale number or something! Ha! Made me smile a lot.
:) Yeah, I was thinking that was it. Or one of the movies from the same director/ gang.
I think I've posted it on the site before - -
my favorite scene in that movie is one no one ever seems to remember when I'm around people who talk about the movie. I swear I remember a hilarious-to-me scene in which a person is running on the runway, alongside a plane that is starting to take off -- waving and shouting his/her love for someone on the plane - - and the person on the runway starts running into different things that are on the runway. Ha! I'm laughing just thinking about it.
Maybe I have the wrong movie. Or maybe I made it up. If I made it up, I'm awfully funny. Ha!
This post was edited by WelbyQuentin at April 8, 2021 11:40 PM MDT