We’re both going to end up in prison thanks to you. Grrrrrrrrrrrrr.
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Hey, wait . . . ! We had a deal! Partners until death! Grrrrrrrrrrrr.
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It’s neither your first time up the river nor your last. Nothing you’ve got on me is better than the dirt I’ve got on you. They’ll open a new concert hall in my name for all the singing I’ll do about your antics. The assistant district attorneys who will be working to put you away haven’t even been through middle school yet, that’s how long your case will trudge through the system. When the judge throws the book at you, the sentences you get will all be of the run-on variety. I hope you like prison food, that’s all you’ll ever eat for the rest of your life. Hardened criminal my eye! You’ll be sobbing in your sheets every night and clamoring to get your lawyer interested enough to help you every day. And you can forget all about trailing good ol’ Randy D, because top priorities for you will be how not to get shanked in the shower and how to make one cigarette last you an entire week.
In the meantime, I’ll be living in the lap of luxury on the Witness Protection Program. Maybe I’ll send you a postcard. Then again, maybe it’s better that I don’t. So long, kiddo. Too bad they believed my version instead of yours, right? Right!
She did it for lust, folks. Of course, she’ll claim it was love, but I know it was all fed by urges. I get that a lot.
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*Most-searched topics on Savvy’s computer:
9. paying a gigolo without being found out
8. how to help “a friend” conduct searches for a long-lost lover in Minneapolis/Saint Paul
7. Randy D watch
6. overcoming fear of contract signing
5. men who love sandwiches and the women who love those men
4. best no-tell motels in Southern California
3. my dogs adore him, so it must be okay
2. under the grammar officer’s uniform; a tutorial and visual tour
1. how to best use my period instead of my colon
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