Discussion»Questions»Relationships» If a certain ex approached you for a reconciliation, what is the likelihood you would give yourselves a second chance?
The last ex I have from a serious long term relationship is from 16+ years ago. I would never be anything but friends with her. Even that would be difficult. She cheated on me and lied to me. It would take a very long time for her to regain my trust just as a friend.
It could never happen because I'm married, and I have been for decades. I wouldn't be interested in getting back together with any of the women I knew before I married my wife. By comparison, my marriage is the only truly serious relationship I've ever had with any woman; the others never reached levels of commitment nor long-term status. In fact, many of those previous "relationships" were short-lived flings that were only based on sensory gratification. There's not much to reconcile when all that was there was thin and transparent to begin with.
If any of those women were to approach me today, I'm sure it would not be for any honorable, noble, ethical, or character-based reasons.
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This post was edited by Randy D at September 18, 2018 6:57 AM MDT
There would be nothing to go back to. What my partner and I have far exceeds anything I ever dreamed could be between two people. We are solid as a rock.
I see a lot of questions like this on these sites. Can't help but thinking OK they must be so limited socially they don't get out and meet and get to know very many new people. Maybe they spend too much time on their computers. What happened yesterday belongs to yesterday. We move on, we change, we are changed just by time so we are not who we were yesterday so why would yesterday's relationship still suit us?
Amen to that! We both are experiencing new levels and vistas in our relationship. Much healing is taking place for both of us which allows more new and exciting things to take place. Like a snowball rolling down the hill. It picks up more and more. No more destructive insecurity. We are one in the spirit and one in the lord.
This post was edited by Art Lover at September 18, 2018 11:41 AM MDT
I see you have lots of answers already but since people and relationships is my fav topic, I will add my thoughts :P I think it would depend.. usually an ex of mine would have to have done something pretty serious to get themselves into the ex category... and usually it would have involved a breaking of trust... that's kinda hard to overcome.. I also think patterns tend to repeat.. so whatever it was that broke the relationship before, unless they have fully processed what happened and have honestly changed, or i have.. it's likely to happen again..
I had a chance, I think, to get back with someone I considered my soul mate... but when it came to it.. I knew deep down I couldn't really trust him.. that he probably hadn't changed.. so I snuck off and hid under the radar for a while.. and actually he has continued to do the thing he did... so good move not giving that one another try..
There are people I met or nearly met from a few years ago.. they would like to try again and sometimes will pop up every month or so and ask.. but with the ones I didn't meet.. there was usually a reason why they were not considered meetable.. and the ones I did meet, again if I dismissed them then there was a reason and it remains..
All my "breakups" were on mutually friendly terms ... and I'm single ... so the odds are pretty good that I'd be willing to see if there was anything possible (in addition to friendship).
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Randy D 