Very hard to say. First thought was things not done. But really it's a complex of mix both, where wrong choices led to inevitable failures. The choices not chosen were the things not done.
Back when I matriculated at 18, I was offered a place at an excellent uni to do English Lit and Psychology. I turned it down in favour of a place at art school and, after completing, spent the next twenty years struggling as a sculptor and part-time art teacher. The problem was that my attitudes to art - and the type of work I made - didn't fit with the dominant paradigms of Late and Post-Modernism. That meant very little support from private galleries, curators of public exhibitions, the Australia Council and critics. Within the Education Department, it meant I had to teach a syllabus I loathed because I disagreed with at least 50% of the ideologies; I was unable to live with full integrity towards my ideals and beliefs.
The discomfort slowly increased until by 38 I had finally realised I needed to get out. But that put me in another horrid limbo - not knowing what else to do with my life. The period of change did not go smoothly. I tried many things. Eventually, almost by default, I made the purely emotional decision to follow my passion for horse breeding and training. I sold up in the city and moved to this rural area 890 k's north. It proved to be a disaster for numerous reasons, but mainly financially, and 'though I've recovered enough to be out of debt, there is no chance that I'll ever make it above the level of just scraping through with expenses.
The irony is that, as the horse stud and training had to wind down, I began to write prolifically. Slowly it dawned on me that this was my new path. After some 8 years, I'm starting to get good feedback and strong encouragement from professional writers to start submitting my work for publication. It's beginning to look as though, had I accepted the original offer to study lit and psyche, I would have earned a far better income and begun developing as a writer much earlier. I regret the forty years lost. There are stories there to be seeded and cultivated - but I can't help thinking that the path of a psychologist would have reaped a richer and far more diverse harvest.
It takes courage starting over again. I have not much confidence and a far shorter lifespan left to live. Whatever I achieve, it's unlikely to be much.
This post was edited by inky at February 24, 2020 9:53 PM MST
My Goodness bookworm! I am not a publicist nor I am one able to offer you a good paying job with a retirement plan BUT, I can most definitely say, without hesitation, you are one of the best writers I have read here and even out in the touching physical world. When I see your avatar, I immediately smile! :) :) I look forward to reading you and follow your insights. Taking the road of breeding and training horses is a path I thought I would enjoy. Unfortunately, that road was closed early on. I appreciate your passion for the animal and the joy they can bring. I am a reader of yours that truly admires your choices and your ability to communicate through the written word. If I could, I would ask for your autograph on some of your work. Like on here, for example! Big Hugs and Loves, Love, Merlin P.S. Please don't stop writing. You have a knack for it! :) :)
This post was edited by Merlin at February 25, 2020 6:26 AM MST
Actually, when I write here, it does function as practice, developing flow, voice, etc. People come up with questions here which I might not think of, either because they seem too obvious, or because they're so far outside the realm of my experience. This challenges me to think things through, a favourite occupation, addictively pleasurable. Different questions trigger different reactions, invite different styles of response. Occasionally I discover a twist of syntax outside my norm; in that moment, my repertoire grows. Of all the variables, it often seems it's the chattiness and spontaneity that seem to work best - a useful lesson. I'm immensely grateful for the friendships that form here and the freedom the Mug allows.
The writing I do offline: poetry, short stories, chapters of novels, essays, creative non-fiction and occasional bits of journalism.
My access to photography is not great at the moment. I've lost the cable that can download from camera to laptop. If I can get a new one at an affordable price, I'll handwrite a poem about the feeling of trail riding out in wilderness, sign it, post it as a blog here, and let you know. You could download it as a gift from me.
Maybe you could post me a picture of something you've written or created.
Warmly, Manna
This post was edited by inky at February 25, 2020 8:31 AM MST
Missed opportunities are like roads we never took, failures are exit ramps that took us in the wrong direction. I regret more not knowing what could have been.
This post was edited by Don Barzini at February 25, 2020 8:51 AM MST
One thing I did not do.. after I joined the Navy in 1966 I had an idea to make arrangement with my bank to purchase an ounce of gold per month at $35. an ounce. Then I decided there would be no purpose in doing that. After my 9 years service I would have had about 100 ounces I could have sold not many years later for about $900,000.
I don't regret anything. Regret is for children and the emotionally retarded.
What purpose does that serve. If you go past the I WAS SO WRONG and this hurts and I won't do it again, phase, the rest of it is just mental masturbation. Guilt is a rope that wears very thin and if you let it eat at you, you get a disease.
Shuhak, I was going to say that. :) I'm glad we were thinking the same thought! No regrets, whatsoever!! :) :)
This post was edited by Merlin at February 25, 2020 6:28 AM MST
There are many doors that have opened in my favor. Unfortunately, I have let some of them close. I do wonder but not regret what may have happened had I gone through one or two and not chosen the path I did. As far as the failed attempts, I do not regret those, either. I wouldn't be who I am today had I not grown and learned from those failures. Out of the two, I think the first since I didn't take the opportunity when offered. :) :)
This post was edited by Merlin at February 25, 2020 8:45 AM MST
This is only one small example out of many that I could post: when I was single, I met two different women at about the same time and had to decide with which one of them I would approach with the hope of entering into a long-term relationship. (*Some people might ask why not approach both of them and if one didn't work out, the other by default would be the one, but I disagree with that path.) Shortly after meeting them, Woman Number 1 suffered the loss of her father and was in grieving. I thought it inappropriate at that time to pursue any selfish plans of my own when she had more important things going on in her life. I gave her my condolences and checked on her some time later, but she was not in any shape or condition to date or be in a relationship. Eventually, we lost contact with each other, and months or years or later, I can't remember which, we happened to run into each other. We chatted for a while, small-talk really, and said our goodbyes. I was seeing someone else at the time, not Woman Number 2, and it never came up in our conversation as to what each other's status was. She didn't ask me, so I didn't divulge, she didn't offer any information, so I didn't ask. Also, this was the days of telephone numbers as opposed to email addresses or texting, and I didn't verify with her whether or not her number had changed. I believe that by that time, I didn't even have it anymore. When we parted, we had no way of contacting each other, and since I was otherwise involved, I wouldn't have done so anyway.
I don't know if this really fits into the first category of your question, because I don't think I had an opportunity with her. As for the second category, perhaps I failed by not being more persistent, but I ask whether or not that would have been the right thing to do. For a while afterwards, I wondered what would have happened if circumstances turned out differently and she and I had gotten together . . .
It would seem, my dearest friend, that you have switched your drone and or had a mistaken identity. You see, I tend to lean toward a lighter side of skin than the lovely women you have found showering last time. in your last video. .....
Please tell me you didn't send the wrong drone to her house??? Are you getting sloppy in your old age?? My goodness... No more shower oils for you!! You might slip and I will not allow that in my shower!
Big winks and smiles.
Miss you!
This post was edited by Merlin at March 1, 2020 6:02 AM MST
I was advised to buy Google stock a few weeks before it went public. I didn't have any spare cash. If I had an extra thousand laying around to invest, it would be worth millions today. I am such a stupid!
inky 