How might you ruin an English grammar lesson in ten words or fewer? (Assume that Randy D is teaching it.)

This exceeding trifling witling, considering ranting criticizing concerning adopting fitting wording being exhibiting transcending learning, was displaying, notwithstanding ridiculing, surpassing boasting swelling reasoning, respecting correcting erring writing, and touching detecting deceiving arguing during debating.
~ Goold Brown (1851)

This sentence takes advantage of the versatile English –ing. The author of a 19th century grammar guide lamented the fact that one could "run to great excess" in the use of –ing participles "without violating any rule of our common grammars," and constructed this sentence to prove it. It doesn't seem so complicated once you realize it means,

"This very superficial grammatist, supposing empty criticism about the adoption of proper phraseology to be a show of extraordinary erudition, was displaying, in spite of ridicule, a very boastful turgid argument concerning the correction of false syntax, and about the detection of false logic in debate."

Not only is this a great example of the wonderful crazy things you can do within the bounds of proper English, it's the perfect response to pull out the next time someone tries to criticize your grammar.

https://mentalfloss.com/article/49238/7-sentences-sound-crazy-are-still-grammatical

~~~ ~~  ~~ ~ ~~~~~ ~ ~~~ ~~~ ~ ~~~~~.

Remember class, it's "I" before "me" except after "we".

Wanna split an infinitive with me?

I would give you the cane for talking in class....a good gurl needs her shut eye to keep looking her best as you well know by nail.....:)D 

Everybody must bring their own lunch!

Stab the teacher, before given a chance to correct grammar. 

4 sentences of ten words each. I think any of them would put most people off. 

Grammar allows us to organize words so they make sense. 

Today's lesson teaches the verb form for the subjunctive mood.
The subjunctive expresses a wish, suggestion, command, or condition. 
If you were good students, it would enliven your writing.
This post was edited by inky at January 17, 2019 8:19 PM MST

hello counselor i would like to transfer out this class

LITTLE JOHNNY IS BACK:

The teacher asked the class to use the word “fascinate” in a sentence.

Molly put up her hand and said, “My family went to my granddad's farm, and we all saw his pet sheep. It was fascinating."

The teacher said, “That was good, but I wanted you to use the word ‘fascinate,’ not 'fascinating'.”

Sally raised her hand. She said, “My family went to see Rock City and I was fascinated.”

The teacher said, “Well, that was good Sally, but I wanted you to use the word ‘fascinate’.”

Little Johnny raised his hand, but the teacher hesitated because he had been burned by Little Johnny before. He finally decided there was no way he could damage the word “fascinate,” so he asked Johnny to proceed.

Johnny said, “My aunt Carolyn has a sweater with ten buttons, but her tits are so big she can only fasten eight!”

The teacher, the author of several books on grammar and a wizard with words, sat down and cried.