I'll admit that I take as much care as I can not to inadvertently trample on the feelings of others. But around home I have some habits I need to end - like being messy with my clothes, books and paperwork, or asking my vague husband to clarify what he means.
With friends, I don't always know them well enough. An example would be yesterday when Elspeth and I were carpooling to a poetry workshop. We were chatting about our beliefs. She's an almost atheist who thinks there is probably a universal consciousness that exists independent of material reality. For her, it's not the same thing as the usual idea of God because it doesn't cause existence and has no influence over our lives. It just is. I used to hold that position but have become what philosophers call a "materialist". (Not to be mistaken for the common or garden variety of materialist who loves shopping and defines their success and who they are by what they own.) I believe it's not possible for consciousness to exist independent of physical phenomena - or to put it another way, I believe consciousness is physical, a form of energy - in metaphor similar to electricity or light. I could wax on about it for a few pages but readers might fall asleep. When Elspeth heard my definition she mildly rebuked me for sharing my views. It turned out she had suddenly felt hurt and afraid - worried that my view was tyrannical - that the world would be a terrible and unbearably depressing place if everyone believed that. I reassured her that I believe everyone has the right to their own beliefs and to express and live by them, so long as they don't harm others. I told her I wouldn't dream of trying to convince her that my beliefs were right. From there we digressed into a dialogue on the relative fallibilities of science. I'm glad she rebuked me. It deepened our knowledge of each other and our friendship.
This post was edited by inky at August 7, 2019 3:32 PM MDT
I have the solution for the part about your vague husband! Spend less time with him and more time with your specific husband! Problem solved! (What do I win?)
He knows who he is, but not how to express what he wants or thinks. And when he tries, he gets tangled in words that are very hard for me to make any sense of. If I try, he gets cross with me.
I'm rebuking you. I love you. I love your spirit. I think you need an editor. There are too many paragraphs to your answers. Cut out at least half the paragraphs. I GOT IT ALREADY. Why do you have to write a book for each answer?
And DO NOT GET OFFENDED. PLEASE. WAY TOO LONG ALL THE TIME. WAAAAAYYYY tooo looooong
This post was edited by WM BARR . =ABSOLUTE TRASH at August 9, 2019 7:14 AM MDT